Wednesday, March 13, 2013

My Dad, My Aunt, and Cancer Lessons Learned


 I miss my dad every single day.   STUPID - NASTY cancer (melanoma) took my dad from us way too soon.  He was only 51.  I was 26.   I had to find a picture of Berkeley's grandmas and grandpas today for a school project and found these pictures.  LOVE these pictures.....they show totally different things about my dad to me.  The top pic he is wearing his favorite fishing hat up at Slide Rock in Arizona.  My dad loved being outdoors, fishing, and going on adventures with his family.  You can also see the twinkle in his eye.





This picture shows the rugged, tough cowboy side.  My dad was born and raised on a ranch in Wyoming.  I was born and raised on cattle ranches in Arizona.




 This picture melts my heart.  This shows the love he had for family.  You can feel it when you look at his face.  This is his younger sister Tricia.  She also died from STUPID cancer (multiple myeloma) seven years after my dad died.  My aunt Tricia was a beautiful, loving, FUN, TOUGH and talented woman.

  I am still bitter about my dad's death in some ways, have made peace in other ways...........
Not really the point of my blog post.  
Since I have been battling for the 2nd time I have thought a lot about my dad and Aunt Tricia's battles with cancer.  I see them through different eyes.  My cancer prognosis is much better than theirs.  I have not had to deal with all my doctors telling me that I will die soon and there is nothing left to do.   I will recover.  But, I do see them in a different light....they are even more important to me than before.  They are even more AWESOME to me than before....if that is even possible.
  BUT, I understand a tiny bit more how difficult and excruciating their battles were.  They fought a HUGE  battle of physical, spiritual, and emotional pain.  They are truly my heroes.  They really have saved me from myself (another long story).  When I think the pain or loneliness of cancer is too much I think of them.  If they could keep fighting in MUCH more DIFFICULT circumstances, so could I.  I say a little prayer and feel grateful that my battle is a less difficult one.  I still have years to live with my family.  I don't have to tell my kids I am dying and say goodbye.  Now that I am a parent this breaks my heart on a whole new level.
So enjoy these pictures of two of the most important and influential people in my life.
THEN take some advice from a woman starting to come out of a 4 month chemo fog.....

 #1: Go hug your loved ones and tell them that you LOVE them 
and you are GRATEFUL they are in your life.  Life is short and unpredictable

#2:  Thank the Lord for your blessings.....trust me even when life seems to be hard - it could be WAY worse.  Complain a little less...recognize the good a little more.

#3:  Reach out to someone going through a difficult situation.  Give them some act of service, a gift of cheer, a note of encouragement, or a big hug.  Do something.....people going through truly tough times usually will not ask for your help or attention, but they NEED it and love it when they receive it.  I have learned this lesson the hard way.  

 JUST DO IT!!!!

5 comments:

  1. Amazing post. I never got to meet your dad but Michelle was my best friend through that last year of his life. I know he was amazing. Thanks for sharing and congratulations on your end of Chemo! So happy for you. You are amazing too!

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  2. Ha ha. That was Rachel Wilde posting under my husbands disguise! :)

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  3. So glad you have finished your chemo. That was the worst part for me. I know you have more surgery ahead, but it will be over before you know it and everyday will get better and better.

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  4. You are a great example and truly practice what you preach. Thank you for teaching out to me!

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  5. I knew it. This ones a tear jerker for me. Definitely understand the bitter and not bitter part. It is so hard not having her here. Same for you with your dad. They are both my heroes too. I always say I don't think I could ever fight the way she did. I asked her once how she kept on each and every day. She replied, "I look at my option if I don't fight and I rather fight." You have GREAT strength too Gina!!! I ask myself the same thing about you... How do you have the strength to fight? But now having my own children, I understand it even more. The things a parent finds strength to push through. You are an inspiration and a hero to me too! Thank you for such kind words about my mama. :-)

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